Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize