Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
