Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
