The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
