Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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