your parents love me but you hate me
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Randomize
