she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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