He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
