please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Randomize
