i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
