What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize