We're facebook friends in real life
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
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