I'm eating all of the evidence.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Randomize