dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
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