all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I don't deserve a penis
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
