My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
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