dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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