Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
