Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
