She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
