Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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