drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
