Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
