you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
