Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Randomize
