Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
last night I used snow as a chaser
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
