Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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