i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
whose ass print is on the piano?
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
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