this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
