If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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