Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize