I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize