i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
