oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
