Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
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