She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Randomize
