How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
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