her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
so much tequila, so little girl.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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