Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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