Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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