The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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