so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
