This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
