Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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