Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
That reminds me...we need to get swords
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
