After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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