Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
