Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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