you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
