If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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