He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
