Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
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